I wonder if I'll ever feel this way again.

Sun. the 5th

Dear Diary,

Oh heck! I’m ready to fly with a rare mixture of happiness and vexation. I wish —— oh skip it! I think that ———— oh skip that too! Well that certainly is (in)sane. I wonder if I’ll ever feel this way again. 

We went to church this morning. I had 4 in my class. Some one, Billy Strong, nearly had me in stitches. When we got home, Frank & Lou, Vincent, Bobby and Minerva were here. After they left and we finished dishes, we had pop-corn. Then Uncle Dud took us two girls to church. First Leigh wasn’t there. I was way up near the front and he didn’t come up when he got there, naturally. Well then they had baptism. He was, but he put his hand over his nose. It spoiled the effect. 

Then it was over. I made several vain excuses for delay but we left before he came out. Oh, I wanted to see him so much! But I haven’t. It was just 1 week ago tonight he came up and came in and nearly kissed me. It’ll probably be 1 week from tonight before I see him again. He did give me a look though when he was walking in to get ready. It was a thrill too. I think he was rather bothered and a little nervous. 

While I was lingering around, I saw his mother looking at me and talking to his father. I’m sure she was pointing me out verbally. I hoped they’d bring me home. “Vanity of vanities, all is vanity.” 

Harriet said his father looked like Jack Spratt and I told her I thought he looked like his father. She doesn’t! 

I felt sorry for her tonight. She told me she liked Floyd a lot but was crazy about Gerald. I knew it, somehow. I think it would be swell. I like her a lot. She’s a nice kid but what about me. I feel so ——— oh I don’t know how. I wish I could tell. I wish I could have seen him! I was so happy. It made Helen and Mary Low rather disgusted because I didn’t. Harriet said she’s three years younger, and so forth. I’m really sorry for her. 

All mixed up and almost in tears but with love,  (waste of)